Best English Speakers Battle

MANILA, PH- Two of the best english speakers in the Philippines battle for the bragging rights as the "best third world conversationalist in English"

The Department of Education wants to know who the people are rooting for,as the titlist will represent the Philippines in the international essay writing contest. The votes will be tallied via text votes. Just watch the videos and decide.

On the left corner, Janina San Miguel


Famous lines:
>Well, my family’s role for me is so important. Because der was d… deyr… dey was the one… who’s very… haha… Oh, I’m so sorry. Uhm My pamily… my family, oh my god.
>Sorry guys… because this was really my first pageant ever. Because I’m only 17-years old!
>I did not expect that I came from, I came from one of TAF Ten

On the right corner, Stoned Cold


Drugged Lines:
>oh come on!ahahaha
>side by side?
>36 degrees and rrooooooorrrrrrming
>how many degrees in all three angles... 360!
>you're brooming? brooooommmmmmmm!!!
>"did u use drugs?" - yeah i bought it in Mercury Drugs!(a famous drug store in the Philippines)

Surveys, polls and interviews reveal that Stoned Cold edges Janina because, from some of the people interviewed, "Stone Cold can do math equations". Now that's a plus.

Philipines Sold For $299

MANILA, PH- The United States of America recently bought the Philippines for 299 dollars. President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo and Goerge W. Bush recently held a meeting and finalized the buyout, which was then much celebrated by the Filipino masses. The purchasing price was much talked about by the American media, many commented of overpricing.

When Bush was asked about the price issue, he just blurted out that "Philippines=ipod touch LOL" President Arroyo's brave move was the smartest move as of her yet, as many Philippine senators applauded her for her decision. Senator Prospero Pichay of the Philippines said "The best thing that happened in our country since McDonald's came here"

Many changes and reforms were agreed upon the purchase. The new USA state will now be known as "Philippawnd" as the US government plans to make the former country as the internet capital of America. Google and Yahoo will build a number of mega buildings just for their web storage, a plan that might boost the spirits of Filipino teens. The reason being is that USA, supported by google and yahoo, will create 100,000 computer shops/centers with free internet access. Tony Boy, a 16 year old Filipino, was delighted as he stated that he can now log on to friendster 24/7 free of charge, and also will not suffer hunger because of saving school pocket money given by her parents.

typical first class Filipino computer center, usual rate 15 Pesos/hour ($0.40)

The Philippines also celebrated because of the hassle-free instant green card, which was then a problem for most nurses, teachers, IT professionals and brides for sale, as the retrogression is still not lifted.